I think that over the past few weeks I’ve been under some sort of spiritual attack. It’s hard to explain how I feel exactly, so I’ll try and narrate where I think this came from. The context is helpful for me too as I start to piece it together.
Some time ago, I started dealing with my problems at work re: conflict aversion and I realized that I’d developed a tendency to run away from my problems. I just woke up one day and realized that everyday after work I’d come home and just waste time on the internet. I had lost the motivation to read, exercise, do normal person things. This hurt at the time but really started to hurt a lot more once I realized that my behaviors were affecting not just myself but also Emily as well.
Around that time, I prayed about these feelings and realized that I needed to start taking responsibility for my life and not just living on autopilot. The first area
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